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When I go to high school, I will be happy.
When I go to college, I will be proud of myself.
When I get my dream job, I will feel like enough.
When I retire, I will have inner peace.
I have spent my life chasing basketball goals.
- Make that team.
- Win this tournament.
But whenever I complete a goal, a new one appears.
And then a new one.
And another one.
Goal setting does help send us in the right direction.
But like all things, without balance, it is unhealthy.
When the goal setting never stops, it is called the “Moving Goalpost Fallacy.”
This is when the requirements for acceptance continue to change.
We see this all the time.
The pro basketball player who is unhappy because they aren’t playing, but swore there whole life they would do anything to be on a professional basketball team.
The belief that solving your next goal will fix your problems is a dangerous one.
The goal posts will never stop moving.
This leads to:
- A continued sense of failure
- Destroys motivation
- Prevents reflection and growth
- Creates unrealistic expectations
- Reduces satisfaction and joy
- Increases stress and anxiety
When does enough become enough?
When does someone have enough money to feel satisfied?
When does a player make enough shots to feel proud of his efforts.
I am guilty of moving the goal posts.
2024 has been one of the craziest years of my life.
And I still want more.
This drive is what helps me be a great basketball player.
But I have to keep it in check.
In this short life, I have to remind myself to take deep breaths and enjoy the journey.
Here are some ways to help you and myself make sure we don’t get caught in the “Moving Goalpost Fallacy.”
1. Set clear, measurable goals.
2. Celebrate milestones
3. Reevaluate goals with intention
4. Focus on enjoying the journey
Let us here take a moment to celebrate something you are proud of doing.
A goal you have achieved recently.
I asked some of my closest friends to share with me something they are proud of.
Here are their incredible achievements, I hope you can add to it:
“I went to a concert by myself.”
“My family I created.”
“Being asked to be godfather.”
“My mindset on the basketball court when things haven’t been going my way.”
“Getting the application done for my passport.”
“MVP of NBL1 south.”
“I am proud of my friendship circle.”
“Being named head coach.”
“I am proud of how I held myself and what I learned about myself during a chaotic experience in a foreign country.”
“Reaching the summit of Mt Kilimanjaro (the roof of Africa) with the most beautiful people.”
“Staying positive and together with the ones I love most, even through hardship.”
“I am proud of speaking up about my struggles mentally and encouraging others to speak up and reach out.”
“Getting two of my dream jobs in the same year.”
“Creating a strong work/life balance by focusing on my small circle.”
“I recently moved into my house.”
“Aight lmk if this is the sort of thing you're after
“I've been able to achieve success in business without having to compromise my core values, and in a way that allows me to give my time and energy to the people in my life.”
What are you proud of yourself for?
“Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.”
— Eckhart Tolle
